Pictures (clockwise from left): Lord Bennington today; the cherubic boy Dodger, before being tossed out of school for taking the head master’s pay; celebrating his release with his Mum
The Expurgated Biography of Lord Bennington
The Early Years
Born Benjamin Dodger in the year Nineteen Hundred and Sixty-Four, Lord Bennington is the only son of an East End undertaker and a fishmonger. Though he loved his Mum and Dad, he spent most of his time out of the house, due to the smell. Young Ben spent most of his time down by the docks learning games of chance, or perhaps better said, chancy games. He claims to be the great, great, great grandson of the Artful Dodger. This, however, remains unverified. “Well, it’s as bleedin’ likely as not,” says Bennington. This loose grasp of probability belies his uncanny knack to win any game, any time.
A brilliant card player – and bottom dealer – by the age of 12, he was asked to leave Stepney Primary school for beating the head master out of a week’s pay. He was heard to cry as they removed him from the building, “He bloody well didn’t have to play me, did he? He’s the one corrupting a young lad such as me!” The constable was unmoved, and Ben then attended the “school of the street” full time, honing his skills in the shell game and three-card monte.
Becoming Lord Bennington
When in need a of a bit of copper, Young Ben sometimes worked as a gravedigger for his Dad. It was on one such occasion that he assumed the role of Lord Bennington. He tells the tale this way, “One day, I’m waitin’ around for an ’ole to dig when in comes an ambulance with the deceased Lord Bennington. Well, the old bugger had all his ‘Peer of the Realm’ papers in his coat pockets along with his keys. I’d seen a story in The Sun – right under the page-three girl – that he’d left no heir.
“So, I says to myself, this is a golden opportunity old son. Seein’ that the bloke was about my size, I tried on his suit and hat. Here I was, lookin’ like a proper gentlemen for the first time in my life and quite likin’ it. So I left the bugger on the slab and went straight away to his town house. I didn’t see it as stealin’, as he had no heir, and why let such lovely things go to waste. The way I saw it, I was doin’ ’im a service. Keepin’ ’is name alive you might say. So, I’m there, packin’ up ’is suitcases when the solicitor arrives to take inventory. I barely made it out the back door.”
Off to America
The new Lord Bennington improvised his trip to America, catching the first flight leaving Heathrow to the United States, which turned out to be headed to Washington D. C. After prying himself out of the baggage container of the jet, Bennington hit the Washington streets in search of a good mark. Washington turned out to be a tough town. “All those lobbyists and politicians were better operators than me. First thing I knew, they were takin’ my money rather than the other way round!” he later said.
Bennington fled to California. Los Angeles. Here, he thought, he was certain to find a less clever lot. Moreover, Bennington knew it was the home of the World Famous Magic Castle in Hollywood. To tricksters of all kinds, the Castle was Xanadu, a place where his talents might win him applause, not jail time.
Bennington Becomes a Proper Magician
Upon arrival in Hollywood, Bennington headed to the Magic Castle straight away. However, he was unaware that it was a private club and he would need a guest pass to enter. To kill time while he thought up Plan B, his Lordship began to hustle the parking valets with the old shell game. It was at this point that fate shinned on our hero (or antihero, as the case may be). The great Dave Thorsen, long-time magic professor at the Castle, stepped out for a bit of air while his students took a break.
Thorsen caught sight of the mischief and quickly broke up the game, but not before he noticed the skill with which Bennington played. After firmly suggesting Bennington return the valet’s their tips – and in one case, the month’s rent – he took Bennington aside. Thorsen suggested a deal. He would teach Bennington proper magic, if his Lordship would stop using his talents for less than savory purposes.
Under the wing of Thorsen, Lord Bennington earned his magician membership in the Academy of Magical Arts. The rest is history. Our hero learned he could entertain audiences and that they’d actually pay him for the opportunity. Though he still retains the right to bilk the odd Hollywood producer, Lord Bennington now delights audiences all over the world with hilarious illusions and baffling feats of magic. He’d love to perform for you at a party, business event, restaurant or bar. You may reach Lord Bennington at ben@lordbenningtonmagic.com.